Monday, December 8, 2008

The Closet of Me

I decided over the weekend that I would FINALLY clean the closet, Mark was so happy, not happy enough in my opinion..I mean really he should have danced the jig or something! Or bought me a present..hehe..anyway, so I am going through all the boxes, all the tubs, all the clothes....etc..etc..etc..I even cleaned UNDER our bed! Unheard of for me..I'm seriously the worst pack rat ever, but I have gotten much better in my old age :) While on my quest to be more organized and clean, I came across some "stuff" that made me go OMG and awww..I remember when I was that skinny...and WTF was I thinking keeping going through this process I came to the conclusion that I might have MPD (multiple personality disorder) or I have just had alot of "versions" of myself....hehe..Scared yet? Don't be! I'm harmless, its the other ME's that have been in my closet that you should be afraid of!

I am the girl that apparently never throws anything away, clothing, make-up, paper, bags, shoes..My rational is that I might actually wear the clothes again one day, what- I used to be a size 6, it could happen again..if I stopped eating! The lots of paper,well maybe I will be a Hamster one day and need it for the bottom of my cage..I don't really know why I do this, but I do, some of the stuff I found was seriously like 10 years old, from my HIGH SCHOOL/College days...I found a note that was passed in my History 101 course, between me and some boy about a rental car and niglets ( I mean really? I needed that for the last 10 years why?) *by the way it was the boy who brought up niglets, according to him they are little ethipoian or african babies..and now I can't remember because I finally threw the stupid thing away! Apparently I used to think it was funny. I also found my report cards, I used to be pretty smart! I now suffer from mommyhood amnesia, it makes you forget everything that you knew before you became a mom.

So, now that I'm a mom and wife, its fun to look back and reminisce about being well not a mom or wife..not always single..hehe..I figured out that I have completely different versions of my outside self, I have always been pretty much me on the inside (except for the brain dead stage when I was teenager).

First version- The "I thought I was a model for a minute"- I was actually a model for a whole minute and then I woke up and changed my mind. But the evidence is still there, I found a few proofs from my first photo shoots..I was 18...I was skinny!

Second version- The "I think I need to shop only at Buffalo Exchange"- for those that don't know, that's a now super expensive "Vintage" shop, that only takes name brand items these days, I used to go there for everything, jeans (which I still own, but can't wear), tops (also still own, but can't wear), shoes and bags. I have all those things tucked away in a storage bin, out of sight out of mind, but still part of me.

Third version- The- "I thought/think I am a hippie"- So this one I still am, I am still the patchouli wearing, tye dye shirt having, Grateful Dead listening, GIVE PEACE A CHANCE screaming hippychic, only more subdued :).

Fourth Version- The "I am a badass biker momma"- Ok so I was this girl for a little while when Mark had a Harley, I still have her in me as well, something about Harley's and Leather and wind in your face and the feeling of flying when you're on a bike, however I can't fit into those clothes anymore either, so they are also thrown into the bin.

The version I am now- "I am a mom and a wife and a blogger and student (again)"- My clothing reflects who I am now, I shop at Kohl's and Target (tar-jay) and Walmart and I no longer care about brands or vintage, or being a badass (even though I am..hehe). I am just Me and I like who I am, I like where I am in life and I REALLY like that I can see the floor in my closet!